The end of the year is a logical time to reflect on life: What did we learn? Do we notice a pattern? What good happened? What are we grateful for? What do we want to change? What will our goals be heading into the New Year?
If you’ve read any of my prior blogs, you will understand this: our lives have a purpose, we are where we are for a reason. Do you know your purpose? Do you know the reason your life is the way it is right now?
I went through most of my life not thinking about this until my life was “shaken” in 2015 by an untimely death. That caused me to question everything in life: purpose, reasons, etc. I had no answers, only questions. I was confused about life and wanted answers, started searching. It led me to evaluating and making significant changes in life, taking action, but without knowing my purpose or the answers to the “reason.” I was lost, but moving, aimlessly, seeking, wanting life to be better but not knowing how to make it better.
2016 was continued seeking, transitioning to a “changed life.” I began praying more than I ever did in the past and in 2017 “surrendered” my life to Jesus, wanting his guidance. I was lost, I needed guidance, I didn’t have the answers, but I knew my way of doing things wasn’t effective; it was lacking. 2017 was a year of mild turbulence: ups and downs and I was wondering why since I surrendered but I kept my trust in God. 2018 seemed to be the turning point, everything seemed to be falling in place and I was grateful. 2019 brought a noticeable “dark cloud” into my life but I still trusted in God and went to Him for answers. I was led to the Bible and read it front to back for the first time and it literally made me want to change my life even more. My eyes were opened. I realized I was not living as God wanted me to. I decided to try to live better. I was hopeful heading into 2020. (LOL) I don’t need to explain 2020 to anyone; I think we all had the same year! But that’s when I “woke up” I realized what was happening in the world. I continued to go to God for answers to my questions and He revealed the answers in the Bible. It was amazing to experience this “communication” from God through prayer and the Bible.
2021 in summary was probably the worst year I’ve experienced in life, but not in every way: God was all I had to help me through it and He did. God is truly all I needed. When the Bible says God is faithful, God provides, God protects – all that is true. Throughout these past 6 years, I’ve learned to fully trust God. I’ve learned the answers to most of my questions (through the Bible). I have a different outlook on 2022, than I have in past years. In past years I looked forward to the hope of a better year. I don’t have that outlook this time. I don’t expect a better year. I actually expect a more challenging year, but I have all I need: God.
I have a mindset very different from a few years ago. I foresee the years ahead as getting tougher, but I KNOW (not just guess) this is only a transition to the greatest years of all time ahead, and I look forward to that with much anticipation. This is a time for endurance and perseverance. I don’t yet know how many future years ahead, but my intuition is that it won’t be too far away. Stay strong, stay connected with God and we will make it through.
Should we trust our feelings? My guess is anyone reading that question will have a number of reactions, such as: “YES!!!!“or “NOOO!!!!” or “I have no idea; I’m confused, help!” So what is the Truth? How do we know which answer is the correct one? These answers are provided below.
Should we always trust our feelings? The Truth is NO.
2. Are there times we should trust our feelings? YES. Then, when? See below.
3. What if we are confused? How can we determine the correct answer? See below.
When Trusting your Feelings is Wrong:
Let’s be honest. Since the day we were born, we started out selfish, self-centered, right? All of us were born that way. If and when we grow and mature (emotionally, not in years), we become less self centered/selfish, but it takes intention and effort to grow and mature, it doesn’t come naturally, just like growth in anything else (such as working out, eating healthy, growing a business, relationships) : “no pain, no gain.”
So a simple question to ask ourselves is: Is my feeling motivated by self-centeredness, selfishness? If the answer to this is “yes” then trusting your feelings is wrong. Spend time being honest with yourself about the answer to this question. Don’t lie to yourself, be honest.
When Trusting your Feelings is Right:
With the same question above, we can know if trusting our feelings is right. Is my feeling motivated by selflessness, driven by loving , contributing to or helping others? If the answer to this is “yes” then trusting your feelings is right.
What if the motivation behind the feeling is selfless, driven by love, contribution or helping others but FEARis holding me back? Fear can a blocker to something good or it can be something that protects us. If the reason behind the fear has to do with a life or death situation then trust your fear! But if not, do not let fear guide you, it is BLOCKING YOU from growth. Say you are motivated for the right reasons and you don’t submit to fear, you proceed, then something doesn’t work out as you planned? That was still the right thing to do because it is growth. We grow when we go through tough times, we come out better! As many say: if we’re not growing, we’re dying! We can’t be doing neither, think about it. Don’t let the wrong kind of fear hold you back.
When your Feelings are Confusingyou:
This is the hardest one! Confusion is telling us to: WAIT, HAVE PATIENCE, but most of all PRAY! If the answer isn’t clear after reading the above testing question to know if trusting our feelings is wrong or right, then our situation is more complicated (based on the bible, confusion occurs when unrepentant sin in involved) and we need may need forgiveness and guidance from God. Waiting does not mean do nothing, it means slow down, pause, be patient but take action in prayer right away. Talk to God about it from the deepest most honest, vulnerable part of ourselves. This is between you/me and God alone, no one else. God will give us clarity eventually. But don’t “do nothing” during this time of “waiting and patience” pray about it often until clarity is received, not “a feeling,” but unquestionable clarity. Confusion is due to sin, according to the Bible. So where do we get this clarity? From God’s word, the bible. This is the coolest, most awesome thing to discover! It seriously has all the answers to the complicated questions and it is the truth.
I wasn’t taught to go to the bible for answers to questions until recently. I didn’t use it as a resource (ever) quite honestly, but once I discovered this, I am so thankful because it answers so many questions. Today, there is no excuse for not having this resource, if you have access to the internet. Some of the bible is hard to understand the first time reading. To truly know the meaning behind a quote you see, you need to read it in context so you get the full understanding. Even when you do that for the first time, there may be questions. This is where other people can help. Not necessarily by giving their interpretation of the bible, but by directing us to other passages that answer our questions. Be VERY cautious of people who interpret the Bible, don’t take their word, but ask questions, pray about it, then you will know. There are many people today who give their opinions, don’t trust “opinions” only trust facts. Facts are found by reading the bible and through prayer. Many people are misguided but can be convincing so they will give us the wrong information and lead us down a path of destruction. Sometimes people truly have good intentions, but are still not correct. Look for answers in the bible and through prayer.
I hope considering these simple questions helps. I’ve added resources and references next:
RESOURCES
A few different FREE online bible resources (check them out to see what you like best):
This “change” has been on my mind for days now, so I’m giving in and writing about it. There are countless books on “Do This” subject matter for those seeking personal improvement. But it wasn’t until I was listening to a podcast, that I truly absorbed the enormity of this realizing this ONE, singular, simple change makes all the difference in literally EVERY relationship we have (family, friends, business, and even strangers)! And it’s a personal change I can make and you can make and once the change is made, it will impact however many people we interact with throughout life: the count could be thousands, millions or billions of people impacted! It’s not easy; but it IS SIMPLE! A simple concept, similar to golf: one that takes continual effort to master the skill; it requires daily, realistically every minute focus, to change and improve, because it’s not natural, but it can make a difference INSTANTLY when applied.
What is it? Changing our mindset from being self-centered and selfish to selfless. I loved this clever statement when I heard it: “being selfless requires thinking of my self LESS” by Rick Warren (link).
Immediately upon stating this, I realize there are some selfless people who are used or abused by others. While everyone should be selfless, there are abusive situations where avoiding or removing yourself from a situation like that is the right thing to do. The book of Proverbs is a source for wisdom about this. It is written: “do not associate with…” In an abusive situation, remember that God values YOU and you do not deserve abuse. God rescued people from abusive situations: The Israelites from slavery in Egypt, Joseph from his abusive brothers, Paul from bondage in prison, Peter from prison, to name a few examples and rescued all of us from something even worse, eternal death, through Jesus Christ.
This is more than relevant this week, because this week is Holy Week , it started this past Sunday and leads to the ultimate act of selfLESSness by anyone ever: Jesus’ death on the cross, offering his own life as a sacrifice for all of our sins, making it possible for every single person to have eternal life with God.
Why “a sacrifice” of physical death was ever a solution to remove sin still leaves me with many questions, especially when something/someone innocent was used as the sacrifice. This is ultimately a law of the Universe, but it doesn’t seem to fulfill justice when innocent die so I still struggle with that. I could understand why those who do wrong could be punished (from a justice viewpoint), but not the innocent, especially as a sacrifice. I think there is more to this “law” than we will know while we are living.
Sacrifice is not something any of us WANT to do, we want to avoid it, if at all possible, even in a minimal way (when our comfort is challenged). But self sacrifice is the ultimate expression of love. When we let go of something we want for the benefit of others or when we give up something for the benefit of others, we are self sacrificing, being self LESS; we are being Christlike. So the life sacrifice that Jesus made proves God’s love for all people. Prior to Jesus’ sacrifice, innocent animals were used for this horrible sacrifice, but God was not pleased by those sacrifices and Jesus was the final solution to end this. (this link explains it more)
Many of us have heard the story of Holy Week and Easter, but we’ve heard it so many times, it loses the impact today, for some. It is so “distant,” so long ago, today it becomes Easter eggs and candy, but this year it will be different. Maybe this is our opportunity to really contemplate the significance of this week? The significance of what Jesus did: This season’s MOST IMPORTANT meaning to ALL of us. To be thankful, that Jesus didn’t eternally die and that death isn’t “forever” for those of us who believe!
Truly comprehending what Jesus did for us makes any of our sacrifices seem small in comparison. But also, it gives me reason for introspection: am I being selfish, self-centered, or self LESS in living my life? This is one mindset change that will make a tremendous difference for both others (now) and our eternity (later).
Wishing you a Happy Easter and hoping we all change for the better this year!
2 am this morning and I wake up like it’s time to get prepared for the day, except it’s not! But a clear thought was in my head:
“All action eventually leads to a result – based on the priority we give it.”
If you review the titles of my prior blogs, you will see they are a journal of life events over the past four years (since 2016), searching for happiness and life purpose, leading to change along the way. In hindsight, the past four years went by so quickly but I’m not yet where I want to be in life. I hesitated in writing anything reflecting on 2019 because I can only describe it as one of the most challenging years of my life in almost every aspect (everything I prioritized in life was in turmoil); the positive highlights are the only things I posted on social media.
Having my priorities in life in turmoil, led me to the darkest time of my life, so dark that I was truly ready for my life to be over which further complicated my life by paralyzing my ability to accomplish anything that was a priority to me. Before I scare anyone I know reading this, I do not believe in suicide and that was never an option for me: I believe only God holds that authority to end a life; not us. A few who are closest to me suggested seeing a counselor to get through this, which I did, but was ineffective for me unfortunately. I wanted help getting through this time in my life, but it didn’t happen from the outside, so I stopped. But I knew that I needed help. It was finally at this point when I truly gave up on everything and tried one more way for help: I thought: if God created everything, He can do the impossible; then He is the only way I will get through this.
My first realization: While I was partially focused on changing my way of living, I wasn’t completely. Looking back to something I wrote years ago (2017) about Trust and Obey shows my resistance to obedience. As I’ve heard before: we keep experiencing the same results until we learn the lesson. And 2019 was living proof that it’s not enjoyable continuing the lessons, it’s easier to be obedient to God’s commands.
My second realization: I was still putting other things/sources before God; I wasn’t completely trusting God to make the significant changes in my life.
I started reading the bible, obsessed with trying to gain wisdom and understanding from the bible to get through this time because it was my only hope. While reading it, I realized I never truly “Surrendered to God” like I thought I did a couple years ago. I believed I surrendered, when I asked God to guide me, but I was still living how I wanted to live and doing everything based on my own feelings. After reading the bible, it became clear: I needed to change the way I was living. I read about peace, joy, contentment, no anxiety, no worries in all times of life, but I wasn’t experiencing that and didn’t understand why it wasn’t happening for me, when so many wrote about that experience in the bible? I needed that.
It was when I paid attention to a certain detail in the bible that I found the answer. There were people who were baptized by someone, but didn’t receive the Spirit of God. I know this is an “out there” kind of statement for many people, but it’s in the bible and I have faith. Here are the supporting verses from the bible:
“because the Holy Spirit had not yet come on any of them; they had simply been baptized in the name of the Lord Jesus” Acts 8:16 NIV
“For John baptized with water, but in a few days you will be baptized with the Holy Spirit” Acts 1:5 NIV
“Then I remembered what the Lord had said: ‘John baptized with water, but you will be baptized with the Holy Spirit.‘ Acts 11:16 NIV
“Therefore, go and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit.” Matthew 28;19 NLT
John the Baptist baptized people in preparation for Jesus, this baptism was for repentance (deep sorrow for a past sin, wrongdoing, regret for past action), but the Holy Spirit is what people need for guidance, strength and true life change.
“I didn’t know he was the one, but when God sent me to baptize with water, he told me, ‘The one on whom you see the Spirit descend and rest is the one who will baptize with the Holy Spirit.’ John 1:33 NLT
“As Jesus came up out of the water, he saw the heavens splitting apart and the Holy Spirit descending on him like a dove.” Mark 1:10 NLT
“I baptize with water those who repent of their sins and turn to God. But someone is coming soon who is greater than I am- so much greater that I’m not worthy even to be his slave and carry his sandals. He will baptize you with the Holy Spirit and with fire.” Matthew 3:11 NLT
“But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness” Galatians 5:22 NLT
“But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes upon you. And you will be my witnesses, telling people about me everywhere- in Jerusalem, throughout Judea, in Samaria, and to the ends of the earth.” Acts 1:8 NLT
“I pray that God, the source of hope, will fill you completely with joy and peace because you trust in him. Then you will overflow with confident hope through the power of the Holy Spirit.” Romans 15:13 NLT
“So you received the message with joy from the Holy Spirit in spite of the severe suffering it brought you. In this way, you imitated both us and the Lord.” 1 Thessalonians 1:16 NLT
“But you have received the Holy Spirit, and he lives within you, so you don’t need anyone to teach you what is true. For the Spirit teaches you everything you need to know, and what he teaches is true- it is not a lie. So just as he has taught you, remain in fellowship with Christ.” 1 John 2:27 NLT
“So how does a person become filled with the Holy Spirit?” was my next question.
“He is the Holy Spirit, who leads to all truth. The world cannot receive him, because it isn’t looking for him and doesn’t recognize him. But you know him, because he lives with you now and later will be in you.” John 14:17 NLT
“Peter replied, “Each of you must repent of your sins and turn to God, and be baptized in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. Then you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit.” Acts 2:38 NLT
When we live our lives as Jesus showed by his actions and advice (turning away from sin), we are able to receive the Holy Spirit.
“Don’t be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead be filled with the Holy Spirit.” Ephesians 5:18 NLT
“But you are not controlled by your sinful nature. You are controlled by the Spirit if you have the Spirit of God living in you. (And remember that those who do not have the Spirit of Christ living in them do not belong to him at all.)” Romans 8:9 NLT
“And do not bring sorrow to God’s Holy Spirit by the way you live. Remember, he has identified you as his own, guaranteeing that you will be saved on the day of redemption.” Ephesians 4:30 NLT
Changing the way we live:
“With the Lord’s authority I say this: Live no longer as the Gentiles do, for they are hopelessly confused. Their minds are full of darkness; they wander far from the life God gives because they have closed their minds and hardened their hearts against him. They have no sense of shame. They live for lustful pleasure and eagerly practice every kind of impurity. But that isn’t what you learned about Christ. Since you have heard about Jesus and have learned the truth that comes from him, throw off your old sinful nature and your former way of life, which is corrupted by lust and deception. Instead, let the Spirit renew your thoughts and attitudes. Put on your new nature, created to be like God-truly righteous and holy. So stop telling lies. Let us tell our neighbors the truth, for we are all parts of the same body. ‘And don’t sin by letting anger control you.’ Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry, for anger gives a foothold to the devil. If you are a thief, quit stealing. Instead use your hands for good hard work, and then give generously to others in need. Don’t use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them…Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior. Instead be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.” Ephesians 4: 17 -32
My third realization: Even though 2019 was one of my worst years ever, it brought me closer to God.
My fourth realization: This is something else that I found throughout the bible: God uses hardships to draw people closer to Him – that must be what has been happening in my life. There are numerous examples and stories in the bible about this.
My fifth realization (this morning):
“All action eventually leads to a result – based on the priority we give it.”
Seeking God daily by listening to encouraging, motivational bible derived messages that apply to every day living (click for a resource I access) (website) or reading something from the bible that’s relevant to a feeling I’m experiencing through this app (click here) appears to be making a difference for me: I truly am much more at peace with life even when it’s not easy, I have more patience, calmness, almost no anxiety, even though I should based on circumstances, I don’t have it, I trust that God will take care of it, if I do what is right. And after I started changing my ways, truly unexpectednumerous good things began happening in my life.
This experience made me realize that God needs to remain THE priority in my life. This is wisdom from the bible: “Seek the Kingdom of God above all else and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need.” Matthew 6:33
About five years ago, this question became more important to me: “What is my purpose in life?”
(To be honest, this question was lingering in me, unrecognized as a teenager too, but I never put much thought into it. I would make decisions about my future when I felt like I was running out of time, and had to choose something, then I’d quickly make a decision, go with it, figuring out how to make it work over time.)
As time passed, I truly wanted to know the answer because I felt like there had to be more to life. I felt like I had been wasting time, and didn’t want to continue this way, so I started searching for the answer. I can remember thinking: “We can’t just be here to eat, sleep, and do whatever it is that keeps us busy during the day and night?” There should be something more important, more meaningful in life, than “existing and taking up space:” a Purpose.
I finally stumbled upon the answer to this question in the Bible:
“For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.” Ephesians 2:10
So the answer is: God created each of us with a specific purpose to fulfill. But when we find an answer like this, let’s be honest: “Who is looking to do MORE work and have MORE responsibilities than we already have?” Probably not many, UNLESS the REWARD is worth it, right? So is the reward worth it?YES! For this answer to be personally true, meaningful and understood for each of us, it requires a relevant context, because without that, we are probably not interested.
So why is this information relevant to each and every person?
It is relevant because it affects our future: what happens to us and is something that only we, personally, can direct, through our daily choices. To receive the reward, we must have faith in Jesus, however we will be judged on our faith through our actions (our works and obeying the Ten Commandments). “Faith without works is dead.” James 2:14-26
So why would we trust what the Bible has to say?
The information in the Bible is from God, our creator, Who speaks only in truth, and reveals some of the mysterious aspects of our existence through the Bible about what is happening and why it is happening. The Bible is an historical book providing reasons why some events took place, giving proof of God through miraculous events, prophesies that came true and through living proof when Jesus was present on earth and teaching, died and rose from the dead. All of this was done to help us, strengthen us and for God to see what choice we will make once we find out and learn about this. (Think about this: Have you ever evaluated a relationship to see if it was worthwhile? That’s what God’s doing with us: He’s giving us a choice about a relationship with Him.)
The Bible is like an “open book test”: the answers are there, but will we seek them and then apply them to be successful? What we are experiencing in our lives right now is something more significant in process: it is a test with a significant reward (heaven/eternal life), if we are successful and horrible consequences (hell) if we fail. So this is why it is important to know what’s in the Bible and apply what we learn.
This is personal: the best way to get answers to our individual questions is by reading the Bible and praying for the understanding of what we read, because this is how God communicates with us; God will provide clarity, directly to each of us when we are looking for answers in the Bible and through prayer. Seek God first in everything. (Matthew 6:33)
So getting back to our purpose in life, I wondered: We were created to do whatspecific “good works”?
Doing these “good works” and obeying is evidence of our Faith, which is required to receive God’s reward and our life right now is a TEST. The day-to-day “worldly” things that we experience and worry about are truly UNIMPORTANT and INSIGNIFICANT when we understand the high level reason we were created and what we should have our focus. There is so much to focus on in life, but if we make God the priority and focus in our minds, everything else will fall into place. That’s why the Bible tells us not to worry: God provides what we need in support of His plan for us. (Side note: this also explains the reason for some unanswered prayers.) This also requires faith; we have to have faith in God to really believe that He provides, but little by little as our faith grows, we start seeing this come true, which grows our faith.
Getting back to “good works” I also found this answer:
“We have different gifts, according to the grace given to each of us.” Romans 12:6
The gifts, given by God for the purpose God determined when He created us, are:
Prophesying: boldly proclaiming God’s word
Serving: physical and spiritual help provided to others
Teaching: applying information from the Bible in a clear, accurate and understanding way to others
Encouraging: motivating others to take action and fulfill their purpose
Giving: providing material and financial resources to others
Leading: various Leadership Roles
Showing Mercy: comforting those in need
What gift is mine?
When we work using the specific gift we were created for, our actions happen with ease, we are comfortable and enjoy what we are doing, using the gift feels natural to us, personally. The specific gift we were given is also something that others will notice in us, and likely tell us we seem so “natural” in our actions when operating in that way.
Life is complicated, but the overall simple goal and purpose for us is to Love. Love God and each other.
In summary: God created each of us for a specific purpose of His, and provides us unique gifts to fulfill His plan; which also means every person is very important and is here for a reason!
S.A.I.L. 