Category: FAMILY

Loss.

Everyone deals with loss differently. This morning when I woke, I found out my smiling, happy, “funny smiling” little 1 year old nephew Sebastian went to be with God at 3:30 am. I was at a loss of words, we all were praying for a miracle leading up to this. I firmly believe in the possibility of miracles; they can happen through the power of God’s spirit, but what we don’t know is God’s will and plan and whether or not our request matches up with that. Yes, God works all things for the good of those He loves, but that doesn’t mean that our knowledge and understanding is as broad as God’s. He knows things we don’t, so this is where trust in God is necessary.

God grieves with us, death was not part of His original plan for us, but the evil one, Satan, changed that when sin entered into creation. But it won’t be like this forever. I didn’t understand until recently why God protected the tree of life in the garden of Eden after sin entered, but I finally do: God didn’t want those he loves to live with sin eternally. Life spans in the Old Testament were once incredibly long, but because of sin, God shortened life spans. This is another truth revealed by God in the Bible and it is a protection for those God loves; our time here is limited and those with shorter life spans are more protected by God.

The power, peace and strength that God extends to those “in Jesus” is amazing. I have so much love and respect for my brother Kevin and his wife Shay for the way they were strong, loving, faithful parents doing everything possible for Sebastian; there is no way they could have been as strong as they have been if they didn’t have the faith in Jesus they do. I pray they are comforted and that God continues to reveal His goodness going forward because this is not something we can prepare for, strength will be needed; please pray to Jesus with me for them! I also pray for sweet little MJ, Sebastian’s sister, she is such a happy, playful, sweet girl with a very grown up personality and ask that you pray for her too. Pray for the whole family.

Heaven isn’t the final destination, but during this time, Sebastian will have the greatest Dad of all (God) caring for him until God’s kingdom is brought to earth, then we (those who believe and follow Jesus’ way) will be living once again without pain, suffering, death in real living bodies, but glorified ones we can’t yet comprehend. This is not the end, this is a transition time: read more about this here.

This is the truth; all praise, honor and glory to God for ever and ever. Amen.

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Conditioned by Tradition? Like a Zombie?

Three nights ago, I woke up at 2 am feeling like I already slept 8-10 hours and it was time to wake up. When I saw what time it was, I tried to fall back asleep, but that didn’t work either, so I wrote down what came into my thoughts (the Title of this) and decided I’d write about it later. I didn’t want to mess up the next day by being tired all day. The last time I looked, it was 4:30 am. I fell back asleep but had a weird dream that I woke from that morning too. I guess I should have written this at 2 am!

“Conditioned by Tradition” describes what it seems we are. We are like Zombies when it comes to the way we live, what is acceptable, promoted today, just going along with the crowd, influencers, whatever is being “messaged” to us in our culture and accepting it, living it. It is concerning because it seems like some, or many, people are manipulated by it, completely unaware. The “zombie” analogy fits because it’s a figurative representation of those spiritually, walking dead, unaware of where they are headed. I think we are all in that condition, until we realize why we are here, what our purpose is and learn about the past (the beginning of earth). We’ve seen super hero movie scripts about good vs. evil, so that perpetuates the thought in us, making it easy for us to think this spiritual war is fictional, make believe, etc. But is it really?

If you read the bible, it tells us there is an unseen war that has been happening, continues today and will continue until the end of the earth: a spiritual war. And before you immediately reject what I’m saying, even if you are an atheist, you realize things you can’t see do exist. I’ll give a few examples: air, gravity, sound waves, and oxygen. Individually we are such a small part of our community, city, nation, continent, earth, and the universe. There is so much complexity, so much order, so much magnificence- this universe was not an accident . There is so much to say about that subject, but I don’t want to get side tracked.

To continue with the “conditioned by tradition,” thought, we need to accept the possibility of a spiritual warfare …so what is this war about? It’s about us and who “owns” us. Yes, that’s another concept we need to accept: we are owned by one or the other: by God or evil. If we are not with God, we are a slave to evil; Jesus explains this.

The links in the prior paragraph will explain this further (directly from the bible verses). When we comprehend this, then we see the manipulation that’s already transpired, notice it as it’s transpiring and also see those who are manipulated, thinking they are “free” but actually are “enslaved” Remember: Love is a choice; God gives us the choice; God is love. That is freedom. We choose it.

Getting back to “conditioned by tradition,” we are blind to many evil things, deception and manipulation that are now a part of our culture and tradition. For example, when was the last time you thought about the words in some nursery rhymes? Just why? Then we have Easter coming up this weekend. This is the most important Christian Holiday because this is when (we) God’s children (past, present and future) were “purchased” through Jesus’ death on the cross. Jesus was the sacrifice that was accepted as “payment” for God’s children. So of course this holiday is even marred by taking the focus off Jesus and putting it on eggs, bunnies, candy and whatever. It’s interesting how some pagan traditions just casually blended in and today, it’s just normal, most of us probably never thought much about it: “conditioned by tradition”. The celebrations aren’t “bad” unless we allow them take the focus off Jesus. This day/celebration commemorates the greatest gift we’ve ever been offered, and many people don’t even comprehend this, therefore can’t appreciate this.

I hope and pray that more people begin to realize our purpose here on earth, how God is trying to reach us, how much He loves us and wants us to be a part of His Kingdom. Pay attention to the “conditioned by tradition” and don’t let it happen to you.

UPDATE: March 30, 2022 (almost a year to the date that this post was first published) so I felt compelled to update this post. I was raised Catholic and realized what is contained in this video on my own without anyone pointing it out to me; and it shocked me! This video is definitely worth watching: YouTube Video Link click here.

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Should We Trust our Feelings?

Should we trust our feelings? My guess is anyone reading that question will have a number of reactions, such as: “YES!!!!“or “NOOO!!!!” or “I have no idea; I’m confused, help!” So what is the Truth? How do we know which answer is the correct one? These answers are provided below.

  1. Should we always trust our feelings? The Truth is NO.

2. Are there times we should trust our feelings? YES. Then, when? See below.

3. What if we are confused? How can we determine the correct answer? See below.

When Trusting your Feelings is Wrong:

Let’s be honest. Since the day we were born, we started out selfish, self-centered, right? All of us were born that way. If and when we grow and mature (emotionally, not in years), we become less self centered/selfish, but it takes intention and effort to grow and mature, it doesn’t come naturally, just like growth in anything else (such as working out, eating healthy, growing a business, relationships) : “no pain, no gain.”

So a simple question to ask ourselves is: Is my feeling motivated by self-centeredness, selfishness? If the answer to this is “yes” then trusting your feelings is wrong. Spend time being honest with yourself about the answer to this question. Don’t lie to yourself, be honest.

When Trusting your Feelings is Right:

With the same question above, we can know if trusting our feelings is right. Is my feeling motivated by selflessness, driven by loving , contributing to or helping others? If the answer to this is “yes” then trusting your feelings is right.

What if the motivation behind the feeling is selfless, driven by love, contribution or helping others but FEAR is holding me back? Fear can a blocker to something good or it can be something that protects us. If the reason behind the fear has to do with a life or death situation then trust your fear! But if not, do not let fear guide you, it is BLOCKING YOU from growth. Say you are motivated for the right reasons and you don’t submit to fear, you proceed, then something doesn’t work out as you planned? That was still the right thing to do because it is growth. We grow when we go through tough times, we come out better! As many say: if we’re not growing, we’re dying! We can’t be doing neither, think about it. Don’t let the wrong kind of fear hold you back.

When your Feelings are Confusing you:

This is the hardest one! Confusion is telling us to: WAIT, HAVE PATIENCE, but most of all PRAY! If the answer isn’t clear after reading the above testing question to know if trusting our feelings is wrong or right, then our situation is more complicated (based on the bible, confusion occurs when unrepentant sin in involved) and we need may need forgiveness and guidance from God. Waiting does not mean do nothing, it means slow down, pause, be patient but take action in prayer right away. Talk to God about it from the deepest most honest, vulnerable part of ourselves. This is between you/me and God alone, no one else. God will give us clarity eventually. But don’t “do nothing” during this time of “waiting and patience” pray about it often until clarity is received, not “a feeling,” but unquestionable clarity. Confusion is due to sin, according to the Bible. So where do we get this clarity? From God’s word, the bible. This is the coolest, most awesome thing to discover! It seriously has all the answers to the complicated questions and it is the truth.

I wasn’t taught to go to the bible for answers to questions until recently. I didn’t use it as a resource (ever) quite honestly, but once I discovered this, I am so thankful because it answers so many questions. Today, there is no excuse for not having this resource, if you have access to the internet. Some of the bible is hard to understand the first time reading. To truly know the meaning behind a quote you see, you need to read it in context so you get the full understanding. Even when you do that for the first time, there may be questions. This is where other people can help. Not necessarily by giving their interpretation of the bible, but by directing us to other passages that answer our questions. Be VERY cautious of people who interpret the Bible, don’t take their word, but ask questions, pray about it, then you will know. There are many people today who give their opinions, don’t trust “opinions” only trust facts. Facts are found by reading the bible and through prayer. Many people are misguided but can be convincing so they will give us the wrong information and lead us down a path of destruction. Sometimes people truly have good intentions, but are still not correct. Look for answers in the bible and through prayer.

I hope considering these simple questions helps. I’ve added resources and references next:

RESOURCES

A few different FREE online bible resources (check them out to see what you like best):

Selfishness “Wisdom” from the Bible:

THE “RIGHT” FEELINGS TO FOLLOW ARE MOTIVATED BY SELFLESSNESS AND LOVE- FROM THE BIBLE:

FEAR ADDRESSED IN THE BIBLE:

HOW TO DEAL WITH CONFUSION AND TIMES OF CONFUSION (CAUSED BY SIN) – FROM THE BIBLE:

FIRST SEEK GOD – FROM THE BIBLE:

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2021 is Our “Do Over” Year

2021 is our “Do Over” Year

….with that in mind we have something to celebrate:

Happy New Year: Day 1 of the year 2021!

2020 gave many of us a “ feeling” of “being defeated” during the course of that year. But we probably all learned something from the things that happened, especially those events that were “out of our control.”

Life (physically) is meant to be out of our control (God decides), but our eternal life (spiritually) is within our control. We have freedom of choice: we get to choose eternal life or reject eternal life (but rejecting eternal life, by default, means choosing eternal torment, even if we don’t want to accept this, or believe it, it is the truth and a reality we all will face). The second phase of life is way more valuable to us than the first. If you’re reading this: you and I get a “do over” starting today: Day 1 of the year 2021. That’s something to be thankful and grateful for right now!

I’m looking forward to 2021 with a new mindset based on what I learned during 2020.

I’m heading into 2021 with: A positive mindset having no fear of the future (because I’m under God’s protection), knowing there is a place of true peace in my future even when it isn’t peaceful here and now it will be (with God in eternity), knowing I’m in control of my destiny based on my decisions regarding the most important aspect of my life (eternity) no matter what happens outside my control.

NEW YEAR GOALS: With every future important decision, these are questions I will use when evaluating what is the right direction (for important matters). I never gave much thought to this before, but just now realized, the only important decisions are ones that affect God or other people! If these questions below don’t apply, then the choice probably doesn’t matter for the most important phase of my life: eternity and whatever I choose is truly okay.

2021 questions:

1. Am I making this decision out of love? Not the “feeling,” but the love that God wants us to give Him and others (our obedience to His commands: 10 Commandments) that proves we love God. As I linked the Bible scripture to the 10 Commandments, I noticed something: it’s from the 20th book through verse 21! 2021! (that’s nothing more than an easy way to remember where the 10 Commandments are located: Exodus 20: 1-21)

2. Will my decision or action do something that will create some sort of joy (for God or someone else)?

3. Will my decision lead or create peace? (Blessed are the peacemakers)

4. Am I being patient? Not forcing something for my own selfish reasons? I need to have patience.

5. Is this kind?

6. Is this good? (From God’s value system)

7. Does this show faithfulness and loyalty to God?

8. Am I handling this decision in a gentle manner if it involves someone else?

9. Am I being impulsive? Should I take more time to make the decision?

The questions above relate to characteristics regarding “the fruit” of the Holy Spirit (Galatians 5: 22-23). When we have a relationship with God (which is what I choose/want), those characteristics are present, so if we want to make “the right” decisions for our life, we can use those questions to direct our actions (what we control).

Getting back to eternal life: Jesus said, the only way to eternal life is through Him/Jesus and to be born again. Being born again is a spiritual birth, a new “person,” a new way of thinking, a new mindset, it means surrendering to God by doing what is right (read the last sentence again), changing our ways to God’s ways (this is Baptism), then we are prepared to receive the Holy Spirit’s gifts. If we don’t change our ways (become a “new” born again person), we can’t receive the Holy Spirit’s gifts and if we don’t change our ways/surrender to God, that’s when we might hear from Jesus: “I never knew you.” on Judgement Day.

If we don’t obey, then we won’t receive the gifts of Holy Spirit (these gifts are provided so we can help each other/be of service to one another, the gifts are for service to others, not for our own benefit) and as Jesus said we have to ask for this. The gifts from the Holy Spirit are different for different people (not everyone receives the same gift).

To summarize, I’m starting 2021 with a new mindset: A mind set on eternity, because 2020 woke me up and made me realize I was given additional time and the opportunity to change my future in a positive direction. Happy New Year!

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Why we should never blame God:

I was not ready to get up today at 4:30 am, but this thought woke me up and it was a realization, a clarification of a question many people struggle with: Why would God let this happen? Why would God do this to such a good person?

It became clear to me this morning: if we blame God, we are wrongly blaming our Creator, who gave us life because He loves us. Think about that for a minute. God gave us life. God made us out of His love for us. Let logical thinking take over our hurt, sadness, anger, pain, etc. God does NOT do bad things to those who love Him. God does good things for those who love Him.

your heavenly Father knows that you need them. 33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.

(Jesus said this) Matthew 6:25-34

Yes, bad things do happen to good people, BUT God does NOT CAUSE that. It is normal to be angry when bad things happen to “good” people, but sometimes we direct our anger incorrectly. Why are we so quick to blame God? If we call ourselves Christians, we should know this: God does NOT do bad things to His people. The Bible is the only TRUTH, so if we look to the Bible for answers, we will find the answers, to this and much more.

Who is Good?

First of all, we need to realize, what we think is “good” is not the same as what God knows as “good.” Jesus made this point responding to someone saying: “Why do you call me good? No one is good – except God alone.” We all fall short in some way of being known as “good” to God. Our days of living on earth are part of the process of us individually preparing ourselves for eternity. (It’s like getting an education to prepare for work, only it has greater implications than a job or career: our eternity.) And we will never be “good enough” which is the reason why Jesus died for us; so that we could be in eternity with God. We are not “perfect” nor able to justify our way to heaven thinking if we are good enough we will get to heaven (we won’t get to heaven “being good enough” – from the Bible). The only way we will make it to heaven is through believing and faith in Jesus. BUT there will be consequences from our behavior.

Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.

John 14:6

Who causes bad things to happen to people?

For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.

Ephesians 6:12

If only every person on earth would comprehend what this quote tells us, we would stop fighting with each other, we would stop blaming one another, we would unite together against the powers of the dark world and the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms that CAUSE the bad stuff we experience here on earth. If we are angry- be angry at the true source, don’t blame the innocent!

Jesus said:
“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” John 16:33

Ephesians 2: 2 ……in which you used to live when you followed the ways of this world and of the ruler of the kingdom of the air, the spirit who is now at work in those who are disobedient.

The entire book of Job is another example, God did not CAUSE those bad things to happen, Satan did. But the end of the story is that God restored everything for Job.

Why does God allow bad things to happen?

We have to remember that God is just:

He is the Rock, his works are perfect, and all his ways are just. A faithful God who does no wrong, upright and just is he.

Deuteronomy 32: 4

Sometimes bad things happen as a consequence of a choice or an action we made (we cause it). Sometimes God allows bad things to happen to test our faith (read the book of Job) to find out if we truly love Him. And sometimes “our time is up” and God is ready for us.

28 Do not be afraid of those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul. Rather, be afraid of the One who can destroy both soul and body in hell. 

(Jesus said this) Matthew 10: 28

If we experience an untimely death of someone we love, we need to put this in perspective: Yes it hurts. It will always hurt. But those feelings are focused on us, if we turn our thoughts to what is better for the person who experienced the untimely death, their suffering on earth was shortened. They didn’t have to endure the pain we do. It is a time like this to remember what Jesus said:

My Father’s house has many rooms; if that were not so, would I have told you that I am going there to prepare a place for you?

(Jesus said this) John 14:2
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Merry Christmas 2020

It is often in hindsight (that we realize) during the most trying times of our lives is when we experience God’s love, God’s people working on His behalf and truly have the opportunity to get to know God. God often uses something tragic in our lives and turns it into something good. He’s done this repeatedly throughout history and continues today.

AN OLD TESTAMENT EXAMPLE- GOD TURNING BAD EVENTS INTO GOOD

Here is one example, of many, from the Old Testament: the story of Joseph (from the Bible, book of Genesis 37 – 50). Joseph was the son of Jacob and Rachel, Jacob who was the son of Isaac, who was the son Abraham and you can trace Abraham back to Noah, Noah back to Enoch, Enoch back to Adam (for those of you who recognize these “famous” names from the Bible), it’s fascinating. Anyway Joseph was thrown into a cistern by his own brothers (due to their jealousy), then sold into slavery when he was young. God had given Joseph the spiritual gift of dreams (that Joseph could interpret and also came true). Joseph rose to great power in Egypt, despite having many trials along the way then ended up saving many people from famine including his own family because of this spiritual gift God gave him. (An example of God turning bad hardships into something good).

A NEW TESTAMENT EXAMPLE – GOD’S OWN SON, JESUS

This is really the hardest to explain because this is unfamiliar and uncommon to us making it difficult to comprehend, but is explained throughout the entire bible (Old Testament through New Testament). There is only 1 God, however God is a triune God (consisting of three in one): God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit. Basically, God sent a part of Himself to earth (Jesus) to save us from evil and permanent death because of God’s love for us. I don’t comprehend why evil was allowed such a heavy influence and power over the earth, except that God is love and in real love, love is a choice, not forced. So that concept helps me understand this. God has given those evil ones a choice, they just didn’t choose God back and that’s what we are living through right now, but not forever (if we love God back). Getting back to the point: God used Jesus’ suffering and death for our good, as a ransom to evil, so that those who choose God will have eternal life after physical death. God used bad to turn it into something good in this, the greatest example, from the New Testament.

EXAMPLE TODAY- MY PERSONAL EXPERIENCE

My faith journey is documented throughout my entire blog. It was ignited by a tragic event, a car accident involving one of my daughter’s closest friends, Andy, shortly after he turned 16. This is when I first began truly seeking to know God, trying to understand the reason this happened along with questioning my purpose in life; rethinking my entire life.

It wasn’t a quick transformation, it began 5 years ago (2015) very gradually and with many personal failures along the way, but increased over time with an intensity that didn’t make sense. I was not a religious person by any means. I am definitely not the same person I was 5 years ago, so much has changed in my life (ultimately for the better). But along the way I experienced some of my most challenging times. No one will understand what I mean unless you have gone through this personally. I am not a “religious” person today either; I have a bible based faith. I see things very differently than before. I understand what the bible means about spiritual “blindness” because it affected me. When the blindness begins to disappear, is when those of us who have been through this experience comprehend what that blindness means. I say “begins to disappear”, because not everything is clear to me from the Bible, but some is. I now experience peace, hope and love as I never have before in my life. The “joy” is something I’m working towards! As I’ve explained before, I don’t write about these things unless something inspires me to. When I feel a “push” is when I do this. My latest “push” has been focusing on “Joy”….it is so incredible how those filled with God’s spirit, who have basically “nothing” by our world’s value system, show this tremendous joy and happiness from God (in an authentic, not fake way). I seek that joy and know that over time as I grow closer to God, I will experience that, because I see others who experience this. Others inspire us: I think that is what leading by example is: those other people who are joyful, lead us to seek joy, which truly only comes from God, because those with joy are joyful in both good times and bad. This is from the Holy Spirit and can only be attained through obeying God’s commands, changing our mindset and becoming God focused. So getting back to the point again: God uses bad things and turns them into something good today as well as in the past. Ultimately the greatest joy is knowing that one day, those of us who choose to love and obey God will not have any sorrows to experience that here on earth, may hold us back from experiencing the joy of God. For true joy, we need to constantly re-focus our negative thoughts on God and eternal life and realize that all pain we go through is only temporary. I pray to God that whomever reads this will experience the joy from God ahead despite our circumstances as we enter 2021.

May God bless you and your family.

Merry Christmas!

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